February 18, 2014

"Most girls don't think I have a penis at all at this point, so if they find out that I do, it's kind of like, you know, 'Oh, well look at that! It's actually there.'"

"It's like a homeless guy bringing you home to his mansion, like, 'Whoa, where did this come from?'"

Says Patrick Moote, a man who was publicly humiliated in a viral kisscam video of his marriage proposal getting rejected by a woman who (later) told him it was because his penis is too small. He's made a documentary — which he calls a "cockumentary" — called "Unhung Hero."

When life gives you lemons a small penis, make lemonade a documentary about your small penis.
At the first link there's an interview with Moote — whose name seems intriguingly to combine "mote" (a very tiny thing) and "moot" (said of questions that don't need to be answered). The female interviewer praises him: "It's a great opportunity to bring it to society's light, so you can kind of unpack these double standards and also to provide solace to others who might be in your situation." And later he says: "Men are objectified almost as much as women at this point, it's just that no one's really talking about it." So I'm thinking he's hoping this will be kind of the "Vagina Monologues" for men. There's big money in that, and big money might equal or exceed big penis in the finding-a-wife game.

Via Metafilter, where a most-favorited comment is: "I don't believe a word of this." Me neither:

1. Moote says he's a comedian who's been in L.A. for a long time (which hints of fakery and doing whatever it takes).

2. The humiliating rejection did not include — as I thought on first seeing the story — the woman's articulating the penis-too-small reason. She just runs off, unwilling to be caught on camera at a basketball game being confronted with an unwanted marriage proposal. Moote is the one who came forward with her reason. He made it public.

3. How do I know the viral video wasn't staged with the woman acting the part of the rejecting girlfriend?

4. He has the kind of face that doesn't say "small penis" to me. The nose....

Another commenter at Metafilter quotes this IMDB review of the movie:
What becomes clear... is the extent of Moote's masochism and the degree to which he must have eroticized the humiliation he supposedly feels. In other words, his shame and penis-related self-esteem issues become both his favorite topic and a kind of weapon that he wields against others. (That's most clear in the scenes in which he discusses his under-endowment with his parents and his ex-girlfriends; if you're not careful, you'd think Moote was being vulnerable and candid. Another likely interpretation, however, is that Moote draws pleasure from making people squirm.)
That's from a bad review, but I see the potential for a kind of "Vagina Monologues" for men, making the private subject public — putting the public in pubic. But are we to think that Moote is going about his public speech the wrong way, because it's not all inward and confessional, it's more aggressive and jerky? But it's the male version. It's what males do — according to this — the aggressive, assholean expression that we experience as comedy. The IMDB review compares it to Borat. Why wouldn't a Hollywood-based comedian cook up a Borat-style project, with ridiculous intrusions on real people?

Which gives me #5 for that list above: It seems like a Borat-style project, and Borat was a fictional character played by a comedian who intruded on relatively ordinary real people to extract funny scenes for a movie.

36 comments:

damikesc said...

At least men don't have to worry about body issues about things they, literally, have no real power over.

EDIT: My kingdom for an edit feature here

Oso Negro said...

Do we really want to go here? A prolapsed edition of the Vagina Monologues where men gas on about their willies? Here at Althouse, we are already blessed with Titus, who has carried the board edition of the Penis Monologues for years. Who knew that he was a cultural vanguard?

David said...

damikesc said...
At least men don't have to worry about body issues about things they, literally, have no real power over.

Right. That's why men never even think about penis size.

Bob Boyd said...

Talking about your small penis is micro-aggression.

TMink said...

I think the next hot topic will involve discussing the texture of our bowel movements.

I plan an internet holiday during that time.

Trey

Fen said...

In other words, his shame and self-esteem issues become both his favorite topic and a kind of weapon that he wields against others.

You mean like feminism?

Oh I get it. Parody.

With a bonus topping of Double Standard and Hypocrisy as all the "enlightened" folk discuss this.

ron winkleheimer said...

This reminded me of a scene from a movie (can't remember the movie.)

" He has the kind of face that doesn't say "small penis" to me. The nose..."

The scene, two women talking about a man:

1st Woman: "He has big hands and feet and you know what that means."
2nd Woman, looking somewhat apprehensive: "No, what!?"
1st Woman, knowingly: "Big shoes and gloves."

Renee said...

Men and women wouldn't be able to compare, if they were monogamous and didn't watch pronography.

I think it's fake, that's not a reason a woman would give.

Wince said...

Working up the courage.

"Gonna put it in... with my diuuuck."

madAsHell said...

This is a performance. There was no rejected marriage proposal. It's all about promoting his film.

Penis, shmenis....driving a woman over the top is an oral exercise.

NCMoss said...

It's weird, Althouse.blogspot keeps redirecting my browser to bodyparts.com

Fen said...

Small Penis Syndrome.

Stop! SPS shaming! Come march with our "Billion Rising" movement as we demand federal matching funds for penile enlargement.

Titus said...

I would be devastated if I had a small cock.

My length, gerth, head circumference to stalk is really quite something.

balls waxed....natch.

rhhardin said...

Once it's four inches it reaches the length of a vagina, unless you're into major cervix jostling.

rhhardin said...

Girth is what you want.

Like the character in Ivanhoe.

KCFleming said...

I have a very great friend in Rome called Biggus Dickus.

Titus said...

Straighties, if you prune your hog it would look bugger you know.

KCFleming said...

"it would look bugger"

Freud, meet slip.

Joe said...

The proposal rejection looks completely staged. He may be a comedian, but he's a really bad actor.

Bill R said...

...A prolapsed edition of the Vagina Monologues...

Good one, Oso Negro.

Anonymous said...

I feel violated.

Can we please go back to staring at statues of men in their underwear?

William said...

If you encounter an Athenian who tells you all Athenians are liars, you should consider the possibility that he's a Spartan spreading anti-Athenian propaganda.......The mendacity of he human heart is no greater than the cynicism of the human mind.

Titus said...

Freud, meet slip.

It was deliberate

I know you guys love the word bugger...

bleh said...

The fake proposal rejection joke is so old and tired by now, this guy just needed a new twist of the ol' routine.

Heartless Aztec said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Heartless Aztec said...

A small dick post. About a comedian who is pulling our dicks er legs. Really? I think Althouse is the wank puller. And all the regular commenters are lined up getting wanked and yanked.

One Brit word - Tosser.

Heartless Aztec said...

And Meade is laughing his ass off. Tell me I'm wrong Laurence.

Anonymous said...

This guy has to be gay and hangs out with women who talk about their vagina all day.

Sigivald said...

Decent folk don't propose in a way that puts the intended on the spot - unless they are, from previous conversation, 100% sure the proposal will be accepted.

I should certainly hope it's faked, for her sake.

Heartless Aztec said...

Like some ersatz porn star Althouse has the ability to have men line up to write about dicks. Classic.

Titus said...

An overly large head can distract from the stalk, or shaft of the peni and make it look smaller.

A head that is smaller than the stalk, or meat part of the cock is equally unattractive and makes the peni look kind of gross.

You need a head that is just a little bigger than the shaft.

Smaller than normal or larger than normal balls always takes the focus off the cock-that is bad.

Focus on the Family
and
Focus on the cock.

Anonymous said...

Moote appeared scruffy-looking in an awful McDonald's commercial that I thoroughly disliked. It wouldn't surprise me at all if in every way he comes up short.

SGT Ted said...

I know you guys love the word bugger...

The first time I heard the word was on a Cheech and Chong record bit "Buggery on the High Seas".

I've liked the word since. I do like the insulting dismissal; "Bugger off".

Scott M said...

Doesn't matter how small your johnson is. Radfems still want you and any of your male offspring culled.

Peter said...

Condoms are available in Large, Extra Large, and XX Large.

Either condom makers figure their are no guys with small cocks, or they figure they don't get any.

Although I suspect size inflation.

kentuckyliz said...

He is saying he doesn't eat pussy like a champ.

Only extremes of size matter. Goldilocks doesn't like it too big or too small--but juuuuust right.