March 19, 2017

"Don’t you all push your strollers through airports in stiletto heels, Gucci, and the possibility of a nip-slip?"

"No? Clearly, you’re doing it wrong."


Etienne said...

Bathrobe in public.

My dads advice: "Good taste never goes out of style."

Bob said...

I'm surprised she bothered with pants.

Laslo Spatula said...

What a top-shelf Las Vegas Escort Girl would wear on the flight home to see the family.

Minus the stroller.

Unless the stroller was to trick her parents: on the initial seeing of it, they would say "finally -- our first grandchild!"

Then in the stroller would be a chihuahua.

Joke is on them.

Because their daughter is a hooker.

I am Laslo.

Leon said...

I don't know. I've seen ordinary people dangerously close to that nip slip look in airports. I guess in the name of comfort.

Expat(ish) said...

I actually have no idea who that is.

Is the husband famous too?

But it still works, as an article body taping.


rhhardin said...

You don't need the fashion. The feminine operation is near-unconcealment. Any wardrobe will do, given that.

What's actually concealed is that there is nothing being concealed.

AprilApple said...

Traveling through most American airports is not glamourus. Parts of LAX look like idiocracy.
So - I just laugh. Glam it up all you want, celebs, you still have to walk to the gate.

Humperdink said...

You can't buy class.

Michael K said...

Who dat ?

Laslo Spatula said...

Chrissy Teigen: I don't get it. A model with an unattractive face. Pedestrian. Vaguely potato.

Of course, this has been pointed out by others (title quotes from the Internet):

"I don't understand Chrissy Teigen's face"

"Is it weird to think Chrissy Teigen is ugly as hell?"

"Celebs who were apparently 'too ugly' for Hollywood"

"Does anyone else think Chrissy Teigen is ugly?"

"Your thoughts on Chrissy Teigen face!"

"Chrissy Teigen's face looks like a baby getting fisted."

You caught me: I made that last one up.


"Chrissy Teigen is NOT ugly!" Which, by arguing the point, kinda makes the point.

For some reason, the media is trying to convince us she is a World-Class Model. The Gossip World (like Tom & Lorenzo) gladly plays along. Is she being pushed by The Gay Fashion Mafia to make a mockery of heterosexual men's desires? She is to Model what Caitlyn Jenner is to, well, Woman...

There are some models that are not 'conventionally attractive', but you can still see something eye-catching about them. But there IS a difference between 'unconventionally attractive' and 'conventionally unattractive'...

Perhaps this is unfair, but if you put yourself out as a Model -- a career based on looks -- you should probably have the looks to back it up. If her face was a singer she'd be tone-deaf...

Other possible titles for Teigen articles:

"Ugly Girls Buy Chrissy Teigen Magazines To Show Solidarity"

"Question for God: Was Chrissy Teigen MEANT to Look That Way?'


"Chrissy Makes Me Feel Better About Myself, Says Girl Born Without a Face"

I am Laslo.

F said...

Good job, Laslo. But they say kids eventually grow into their face. Or is it their face eventually grows into a kid? I guess I'm over the hill -- I don't know who she is. I don't know who he is. And I don't care. If I saw either of them in LAX I'd wonder what the paps were doing hovering around them. I'm not a robot.

LarsPorsena said...

Who are they?

St. George said...

Air Crash Survival Rules

Dress comfortably. You’ll need to be able to stay warm if you survive a crash. Even if that is not a consideration, the more of your body is covered during impact, the less likely you are to receive serious injuries or burns. Wear long pants, a long-sleeve t-shirt, and sturdy, comfortable, lace-up shoes.

Loose or elaborate clothing poses a risk, as it can get snagged on obstacles in the close confines of a plane. If you know you’re going to be flying over cold areas, dress appropriately, and consider keeping a jacket on your lap.

Cotton or wool clothing is also preferable as it is less flammable. Wool is preferable to cotton when flying over water, as wool does not lose its insulating properties to the degree cotton does when wet.

Wear sensible shoes. Although you may want to be comfortable or professional-looking on a flight, sandals or high heels make it hard to move quickly should there be an emergency. High heels are not allowed on the evacuation slides and you can cut your feet and toes on glass or get flammable liquids on or in your sandals if you wear them.

Thought experts disagree, some believe it's best to sit in or near an exit row. Take action--don't be passive--when the plane stops (or what is left of it) stops moving, and get as far away as possible. Before the explosion, smoke, etc. and so forth

Bob Boyd said...

She's dressed just like Hugh Hefner....well, except for the stroller.

Laslo Spatula said...

"But there IS a difference between 'unconventionally attractive' and 'conventionally unattractive'..."

Case in point: Gisele Bündchen.

Smoking body. Model Hair. A Face that, in some angles, is alluring, even beautiful, but in other angles overly stern and planed and somewhat mannish. Sometimes her face is more mannish than her significant other, Tom Brady -- who is, occasionally, prettier than she is.

I would call her 'Conventionally Unconventionally Attractive.'

I bet Tom Brady only gets anal when he wins a Super Bowl.

That would explain a lot of things.

I am Laslo.

aritai said...

Well it's the 2,000s. Didn't you know in the modern age nip-slips are so old fashioned? the CGI built into your phone will use the movie of anyone walking, especially on wiggle amplifying stilts to create a true fidelity 3d rendering including Nips and their heat signature reflecting interest in mating., and tongue signature, from babe to hubby. Ain't tech and the world of open curtains great?

Mary Beth said...

I wouldn't wear those shoes because, more often than not, I have to take my shoes off during the TSA check before boarding. (So, slip-ons, not ones that have to be strapped around my ankle.) The seats I sit in don't really give you room for shoe changes mid-trip (eeuuwww!) but I presume their seats are roomier.

I'm familiar with his music, but had no real idea who she was (even though that song I linked to was supposedly written for her.)

Wilbur said...

"I bet Tom Brady only gets anal when he wins a Super Bowl."

He lives for Gisele pegging him.

Sebastian said...

The hard truth about US airports is that 99% of travelers are slobs.

Laslo Spatula said...

"I bet Tom Brady only gets anal when he wins a Super Bowl. "

"Tommy! My Tommy! You did it! You won the Super Ball!"

"Uh, that's "Super Bowl", Gisele."

"Yes, yes: Super Bowl. The American Football. Yes."

"And, by winning the Super Bowl, you know what THAT means, Gisele?"

"Yes! We go to the Disneyland and you get the anal!"

"That's right. I train hard all year for this moment."


"Yes, Gisele?"

"If I was to win the Super Bowl of Super Models, would I get to give YOU the anal?"

"You don't have a penis, Gisele."

"But I am a Model: I have a lot of gay friends. I would LOVE to watch one of them make love to your asshole."

"I don't think I can do that, Gisele. Shaving my balls for you is about as far as I'm willing to go."

"I bet Aaron Rodgers would do that for me."

"Don't be mean, Gisele: I don't like it when your mean. Plus, Aaron hasn't won a Super Bowl in six years. He might as well be my Bitch."

Okay, then: how about the Eli Manning?"

"Now you're just being hurtful. You know Eli beat me in a Super Bowl. Twice."

"That means I would've had to give the anal to him, right?"

"If you were with him, yes. All winning Super Bowl quarterbacks want anal with a model: it's just a thing we share."

"What do losing quarterbacks do, Tommy?"

"Usually they just get anal from a hooker at a casino and then slap her around some."

"That's not nice, Tommy."

"Football doesn't make for nice men, Gisele."

"You know, Tommy, I have a LOT of Gay Friends that would love to have the sex with you. What is so wrong about you getting your cock sucked by a man? It is just a mouth. Amouth is a mouth, right?"

"I just don't go that way, Gisele. I DO love when YOUR mouth is on my cock, though."

"You do, Tommy?"

"Yeah, Gisele: it keeps you from talking so damned much..."

I am Laslo.

RazorSharpSundries said...

The parameters for what is considered a nip-slip are getting painfully loose. It's almost getting to the point when someone says on the internet that there is a nip-slip of a young beautiful thing I don't even click on the link because I know once again I'll be woefully disappointed. This time was no exception. I guess I expected better nip-slip pic links from Althouse but no, you're just the same as all the other teasing web sites w/their empty promises of nip-slip wonderment. Someday I will stop clicking on the nip-slip links. Just you wait.

Known Unknown said...

Teigen has resting toddler face.

And she fugly.

Deb said...

Women never used to go out in public without hat & gloves; now they wear their sleep attire with spike heels. Can they get any more ridiculous?

Freeman Hunt said...

Focus on the important information: We can all go to the airport in our pajamas now. Bad news... or is it good news?

Birches said...

I'm so pleased others agree that Teigan is not attractive. John legend is also ugly faced. They are perfect for each other.